Big Eyes

“Big Eyes” is a film that just as easily could’ve been called “Big Lies,” because that’s what this film is. It’s just one big fat lie.

Didn’t Mother always tell you not to be a liar? Didn’t Mother also tell you that if you did your pants would catch on fire?

Well, the two main characters in this film should have listened to their mothers.

Margaret Ulbrich (Amy Adams) is an artist and a divorcee with a young daughter, living in San Francisco when she meets another artist, a painter named Walter Keane. (Christoph Waltz).

These two turtledoves swiftly fall in love. Walter wines her, he dines her, and he asks for her hand in marriage. It all seemed quite sudden, yes, but hey, isn’t that what true love is all about?

It was all happening so fast. Margaret takes her new husband’s name and becomes Margaret Keane.

Let’s talk about Walter.

Walter is a painter. His strokes of artistic expertise seemed to be painting city streets, mainly Paris. (A city where he lived and studied art. Wink-wink.) He was also a smooth talker with the ladies and he had a golden tongue when it came to talking up his artwork.

And then there is Margaret.

Margaret is a wonderful painter in her own right. She would love to paint portraits of young children with extremely large eyes. She would say that “The eyes were the windows to the soul.”

One day, Walter took his art out to sell. He also took his wife’s art with him to hock. You know what happened? Her art sold, his didn’t. When people would ask who the artist was, of course he said it was his. Hell, the name “Keane” was on it anyway! What’s one little white lie?

This bothered Margaret, but she sucked it up. She loved that her art was selling. And it was selling through the roof. The Keane’s were able to buy anything they wanted, including a new house.

But deep down Margaret was pissed. This was HER artwork. She was the one painting these masterpieces, and her dirtbag husband was taking all the credit! Plus, she was lying to her daughter and that really bothered her.

This lie went on for years. (Over ten years, maybe longer). She wanted to be known as the artist and Walter wasn’t going to have it that way.

Everything comes to a boil in the semi-climactic final scene of this film when you find out what really happens.

The question now becomes: Do you WANT and NEED to see this film?

That’s where I come in, because my opinion is SO important.

Hmm, do you NEED to see this film?

No, you do not need to see this film. You will not be laughed away from the water cooler at work tomorrow if you don’t see “Big Eyes.”

Do you WANT to see this film?

Sure! Sure you do if you want to see an interesting TRUE story with some excellent acting. Sure you’ll want to see this film if you are a HUGE movie-going fan, like myself. Sure you’ll want to see this film if you’re into seeing well made movies that will be in the running come OSCAR time.

But honestly, do you NEED to see this film? No… You NEED to see “Selma.”

I liked this film. I liked it mostly for it’s acting. Once again Christoph Waltz shines. This time he shines as a slimy, money and power hungry husband. This man can act! Be it a nazi colonel, a cowboy dentist with a good heart, or a horrible boss, Chrisoph Waltz can truly deliver in a role.

And Amy Adams. I don’t know why I always think I don’t like her, because every time I see her in a movie, I love her. (Ok, love is a strong word there… But I do like her.) She is once again brilliant in this film.

Maybe it was her role in “The Fighter” that makes me think I don’t like her. She played the role of Mickey Ward’s girlfriend so annoyingly well that I can’t get it out of my head.

Ok, just to be clear, I like Amy Adams.

You know what I love? Pie.

I also love when people lie. People do it all the time. Hell, I lied easily ten times today. A friend of mine asked me what I was doing this morning. For fear of thinking he was going to ask me to go drinking and watch the football game… I lied. I told him that I had a lunch date with a cute girl that I had met earlier this week. That was a lie. I wasn’t even in California earlier this week! But I didn’t want to go drinking… so I lied.

(But I do wish I had a date with a cute girl… that’s no lie.)

See, sometimes you gotta lie. But DON’T ever lie about the big things. Those are the lies that are going to build up inside of you and eventually explode. You don’t want that weight on your chest for years and years and years.

So, in closing, if you ever paint a picture and someone else takes credit for it, don’t lie and agree with them. Scream from the top of your lungs, “Hey, I painted thatbleeping picture!”

Matty W. Kelley, reporting.

mattywkelley.com

Fun Fact: When I was 16 years old I stole a car with a couple of my friends. It was an attorneys car. We took it for a joy ride. About an hour into the ride we started getting nervous that our fingerprints were all over the car, so we drove it behind a church and torched it. Little did we know that there was a briefcase in the trunk that had evidence proving that his client was not the man who should be on trial for attempted murder. He had a videotape proving that his client was at his son’s high school basketball game at the time of said attempted murder.

It was one of the biggest stories in Massachusetts back in ‘86’. And I watched it unfold on the news for that entire year.

We never fessed up for our crime, and that poor man did 14 years for a crime he didn’t commit.

Phew, that felt good to get off my chest!

Fun Matty Fact: I JUST LIED! I NEVER COMMITTED THAT CRIME!

See what can happen if you lie about the BIG stuff? DON’T LIE!

Ok, to be honest, I have stolen a car, but it was my father’s and it was a Gremlin.

I think I did him a favor.