Cinderella

CinderellaPoster“Be courageous, be kind.”

“Cinderella,” (not to be confused with the 1995 film “Sinderella,” starring Racquel Darrian and T.T. Boy, and had a WAY DIFFERENT ending than this film) is an updated live-action remake of the Disney animated film of the same title.

One of the most uplifting films I’ve seen in quite a while, “Cinderella” gives hope to people who may be depressed or in despair.

This strikingly attractive young lady saw good in everything. Even in her horrible stepmother and equally despicable stepsisters.

The story (which is an adaptation of a book that I never read because books suck) tells of a beautiful young girl who loses her mother. Her mother was her life. She was the one who would teach “Ella” (her given name) to see the beauty in everything, and the best in everyone. On her deathbed she tells Ella to always be courageous and to be kind.

Jump forward a few years and we come to a crossroads where Ella just wants to see her father happy again, so she gives her blessing to her dad to re-marry a woman who he is smitten with.

This lady is a real bitch. (Pardon my french but it’s the most fitting word for her). And her daughters are a chip off the old bitch block too. Actually, the mom is the big bitch, and the daughters are just too dumb to know any better, so they become bitches by upbringing.

Anyways, Ella’s dad goes on a business trip, falls ill, and eventually dies. This now gives free reign for the wicked stepmother to treat Ella like a slave. She makes her cook, clean, and sleep in the frigid attic while those “pains in the ass” stepsisters get to sleep in Ella’s room.

Oh boy, did this movie make me mad! It made my blood boil! But to Ella’s credit, she never lost hope. She stayed true to her mother’s wishes and was always kind. Kind to a fault even. I’m telling you, there would’ve been a breaking point for me where I would’ve just completely lost it, grabbed a frying pan out of the fireplace, and smashed those three beasts upside the head.

And that’s another thing! One night Ella had to sleep in front of the fireplace because it was so cold in the attic! The next morning she woke up and was all dirty from the cinders from the fire! Those three little monsters laughed at her appearance and re-named her “Cinderella!”

Oh, by this point I was fuming in the theatre! FUMING!!! I wanted to jump through the screen and just start tuning up these three demons!

But not Ella, she was cool as a cucumber.

Anyhoo, Ella meets her Fairy Godmother and the tides start to turn. Her Godmother “magic wands” her a gorgeous dress, makes a coach out of a pumpkin and turns mice and lizards into horses and humans. Yup, some good stuff was going down for Ella.

Ella ends up taking a cruise over to the king’s house where she meets this cool dude named Prince Charming. This kat was dreamy. He had beautiful blue eyes, a delightful personality, and a pretty tight pair of slacks…. Oh, and did I happen to mention that he could dance? Well he could. He was struttin’-n-cuttin’ all over the ball room. Chicks were digging him… but he only had eyes for Ella.

Anyways, Ella had to “eighty-six” that dance in a hurry. But in her haste she left behind her glass slipper.

I think you know what happens next. Yup, Old Prince Charming goes to find the gal who fits the glass slipper.

And only one babe in the kingdom fit the shoe… Cinderella.

And they lived happily ever after… while those other three swines rotted outside the kingdom walls.

THE END.

Geez, I hope I didn’t ruin it for you. But if you don’t know this fairy tale by now then you must be living in a shoe. (and that’s another fairy tale you should also know!)

There was only one problem with this otherwise perfect film…

When Prince Charming asked Ella what her name was at the end of the movie, Ella pauses for a moment, then happily trumpets “Cinderella!”

With all the love she had for her mother and everything related to her, why on earth would she not take the first gift her mother ever gave her?

The name, “Ella?”

I mean, come on! This is your time to shine, girl! Don’t take the name those bitches gave you! I mean, what are you, out of your mind!?!?

I lost a lot of respect for you when you took that name, “Cinderella!”

Lost a lot of  respect.

Anyways, great film.

Matty W. Kelley, reporting.
mattywkelley.com

Note: Lily James as Cinderella, Cate Blanchett as the wicked stepmother, and Helena Bonham Carter as the Fairy Godmother were all standouts in this beautifully made film, directed by Kenneth Branagh.

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