It has been a long movie awards season, but it’s finally over. The Oscars were great, The Globes were even better, and once again, THE MATTY’S were the apex of all movie awards shows. Thank you all for tuning in, but now it’s time for me to get back to what I really love to do… review movies.
Since January 1st, I have seen 20 new releases. I have reviewed just a handful of them. Reason being, I have put all my focus into “The Matty Awards,” leaving me no time to sit down and dissect all the great films that are in theatres right now.
Well that changes today. Let’s get after it.
I recently saw “Son of God.”
This film stars Diego Morgado as Jesus Christ, Darwin Shaw as Peter, Amber Rose Revah as Mary Magdalene, and Joe Wredden as Judas. It is directed by Christopher Spencer.
The storyline for this film (word for word) is: “The life story of Jesus is told from his humble birth through his teachings, crucifixion and ultimate resurrection.”
Yet, all you see is the very last years of his life.
I’ve seen this story already. I need more!
In my humble opinion, I’m at the point now where if you’ve seen one Son of God film, you’ve seen them all. Don’t get me wrong here, I love religious films. They are my second favorite type of film. (right behind science-fiction). But with this movie, I’ve seen it and heard it all before. No one is making a “Christ” film that says anything new.
In “Son of God” I thought that maybe the director would explore the upbringing of Jesus Christ. You know, the years that no one talks about. I mean, what did He do from the day He was born in Bethlehem until, let’s say, 30 years old?
He must have had a childhood. Where is the story about that? He must’ve had friends, right? How about siblings? I know He was created via The Immaculate Conception, but did He have siblings? Half brothers? Step-sisters? Did He have anyone to hang out and play with?
There has to be a story there. I know Jesus was once a kid, so did anybody ever catch Him running down the street, chasing a hula-hoop with a stick? Or playing Kick-the-Can with his buddies? Who was Jesus’ favorite chariot racer? Who were His heroes? What was Jesus’ favorite color? What was His favorite toy? What did He want for Christmas? Did He ever drink milk out of the bottle? Was He ever spanked?
And most importantly, did Jesus ever sin?
Then there are the teenage years of his life that I know nothing about. Did Jesus go to high school, or was He home schooled? We know He was smart, so He had to have some education. Was He a good speller? Did Jesus like sports? Was He captain of the greco-roman wrestling team? Did Jesus have a girlfriend? If so, what would be his typical date night? Would He gas up the donkey and take his girl to the mall? Did Jesus ever fight with his parents? And if so, what did the neighbors say when they heard them arguing? I can hear it now: “JESUS, MARY, AND JOSEPH! KEEP IT DOWN OVER THERE! MY KIDS ARE TRYING TO SLEEP!”
And most importantly, did Jesus ever sin?
Now we are at his adulthood. This is where Jesus comes back into play. This is where many people already know the story of Christ. We all know that Jesus roamed the earth spreading the Word of the Lord, but there had to be a time where Jesus walked in on a stoning, or some sort of horrible crime and just flipped out on the perpetrators… Now, is beating the tar out of someone for committing a horrible act on someone else a sin? I don’t think it is. And I’ll bet you Jesus ripped a few thugs off of some innocent souls and put a size 10 sandal in their jaw while He was walking the earth. (Just like Kung-Fu.) Yet you never see that in this film. Jesus stays even-keeled throughout all of the mayhem that surrounded him.
And most importantly, did Jesus ever sin?
I bet there are so many stories out there about Jesus Christ’s younger years that we (the common folk) have never heard. And I bet there are some wicked awesome and funny stories too. Hey, for all we know, Jesus could’ve been a big-time practical joker. Maybe He put a whoopie cushion on Judas’s chair one too many times, and Judas was fed up and wanted to get Jesus back, but his joke just went WAY too far. I wish somebody would make a movie about those years of Christ’s life. I’m telling you, Jesus was the most interesting man to ever walk this planet. So why do we constantly focus on the last years of his life? The years with all the beatings, and the whippings, and the betrayals, and the stonings, and the crucifixion?
Yeah, I know this is the crucial part of the Catholic religion, but I want to hear about J.C.’s good times.
Now before you go ripping me for blasphemy with this column, let it be known that I am a Catholic. I do not go to church much, but I do pray to my Lord an Savior, Jesus Christ continually. And I should, I sin all the time. But MY Jesus Christ forgives me. I know this for sure because MY Jesus Christ has a great sense of humor… Otherwise He wouldn’t have created me the way He did.
Oh, and getting back to the question I have been pondering throughout this entire article:
Did Jesus ever sin?
No.
Matty W. Kelley, A Seat Apart Productions, reporting.
Fun Matty Fact: My favorite # is 33, in honor of the age Jesus was when He was crucified for OUR sins.
(And also because it was Larry Bird’s #.)
You gotta love J.C. And L.B.!