Party hardy, rock-n-roll! You know the rest.
It’s movie review time, so let’s get right to it.
“Project X.”
There are many movies out there in the celluloid stratosphere that suck. There are also many movies out there that are ground breaking originals. You have your masterpieces. You have your F/X littered extravaganzas. There are beautiful period pieces, and timeless fairy tales. You have something for everyone, and everyone loves something.
So where do I put “Project X?”
I don’t know. I put it in limbo. A movie Purgatory, if you will. It should belong somewhere… but I just don’t know where.
As I walked out of the theatre some 72 hours ago, I was saying to myself, “Man, that was a good flick!” But three days have passed and I still have no real idea on how to write a review on this.
Did I like it? Yes… but as the days have slipped by, I’ve found myself not really remembering too much of the movie. And that is not a good sign. Not for me, not for the movie. Maybe I’m developing the early stages of dementia, (which is quite possible) or maybe this movie doesn’t have the legs that it needs to stand on for a long period of time.
Ok then, let me tell you about it. It’s a story we’ve all heard before.
Three nerdy high school seniors try to make a name for themselves by throwing a blow-out at the birthday boy’s house while his parents are away for the weekend (I tried this at my house when I was a senior, but no one showed up). Of course, the party gets WAY out of control. And when I say WAY out of control, I mean a Mercedes ends up in the pool, a little person ends up in an oven, Jimmy Kimmel ends up talking about it on his TV show, and eventually the house (and parts of the neighborhood) ends up getting burned to the ground.
Typical Friday night, eh?
Do you know why the party gets out of control? CHICKS, man! I mean, boys will do ANYTHING to impress girls… and do you know why? Because guys are idiots when it comes to girls. This is timeless. Guys have been idiots forever. I bet in caveman times there was a caveboy who burned down his parents mud-dwelling just so he could ‘share a stare’ with the cute little cavegirl from down the goat-path.
Anyway, that’s basically the whole movie. But really, it’s not bad. You know what it is? It’s an extra long music video. It’s fun to watch, but it really doesn’t go anywhere. I’m not sure, but they may have been shooting for an “Animal House” type film, but please, nothing will ever compare to “Animal House.”
What it does have is booze, drugs, nudity, and lots of cussing… and then a little bit more cussing, drugs, booze, and lots of nudity. Now, I’m not going to lie to you, I love all this stuff in my movies, (it’s entertaining, right?) but I think they may have tried too hard with this stuff. They already had their ‘R’ rating. I think they were just throwing it in your face for shock value. But believe me, this is a tiny point. I wasn’t too upset with it, I just want to let you parents out there know before you bring your seven-year-old to it.
The actors in this film are all new to me. All fresh faces. I guess they pretty much have to be fresh faces since they were all in high school. I mean, you can’t have Meryl Streep playing a senior… unless, of course, it’s a senior citizen.
The only face in the entire movie that I recognized was a man who is credited in the film only as ‘older man.’ And he is the ‘older man.’ The creepy older man drinking with the kids at the party! His real name is Pete Gardner, and he was pretty funny for the short stint that he was on the screen. I think you would recognize him from the Michael Jordan Haynes T-shirt commercials on TV… he is the guy on the plane who has ‘bacon-neck!’ Quick review of him: I liked him!
So, “Project X.” What category would I put this movie into? Well, it definitely didn’t suck, and it’s definitely never going to win any awards. But it has value. It is a movie that you would like to see once at the theatre, and then when it hits cable, you’ll click to it when it’s on and you’ll enjoy it for free. And there’s nothing wrong with those movies either.
We’ll just keep it in movie Purgatory for now.
Party on Wayne. Party on Garth.
Matty W. Kelley
Fun Fact: I don’t know why, but almost all the characters in this movie used their real first names in the film too… but not everyone. Maybe it was the producer or director’s decision. Or maybe, they were just lazy and didn’t want to learn new names. Fact: This did not bother me in the slightest.
Fun Matty Fact: When I was younger I was stuffed in a dryer during a party and it was turned on. The dryer broke… and then I had to buy the house a new dryer! I never win.