Month: August 2013

We’re The Miller’s

[xrr rating=4.75/5]
WereTheMillers

I’ve found the second movie of the year worthy of constant belly laughter. The first movie this year that made me grab at my gut was “This Is The End”, starring Seth Rogan and James Franco.

And now I have another.

“We’re The Miller’s” is that film that’ll have you constantly grabbing at your blubber. It’s that funny of a film.

I didn’t really know what to expect from this movie before I went in. I hadn’t heard too much about it. I had only seen a few previews for it in recent weeks, and, well, Ironman wasn’t in it, so it hadn’t really marinated in my brain too much. But of course, it’s a movie, so I was definitely going to see it.

And gosh-dang, am I glad I did! Continue reading We’re The Miller’s

Sharknado

[xrr rating=0/5]
SharknadoSomeone needs to be put down for this film. And when I say “put down”, I mean killed. Placed in a hole and covered with dirt. Wiped off the face of this planet. Layed on a table and injected with cyanide. Dragged out into the middle of the desert and left for dead. Drawn and quartered. Taken out to the town common and hanged. Whatever’s got to be done has got to be done. But make no doubt about it, someone needs to pay for this catastrophe of cataclysmic proportions.

Someone needs to pay. And right now I’m the only one who has. I’m the only person who paid $13.50 to see this disaster of a film. You see, this is my problem. I have a hard and steadfast rule that I will only review films that I see in the theatre. “Sharknado” was a SyFy “made for TV” movie, so I thought that I was in the clear. Now I’m being serious here, when “Sharknado” was playing on TV, I received numerous emails, texts messages, and post cards from all over the world to review this film. But I said that I can’t, because it was not playing in the theatre. Continue reading Sharknado

2 Guns

[xrr rating=4.25/5]

2Guns“Texas Chainsaw Massacre 3D” was a terrible movie.

Ok, now that I got that off my chest I can really focus on reviewing a movie. A good movie! And that movie is “2 Guns”.

Before I even get to the movie, I want to talk about the two stars of “2 Guns”. Mark Wahlberg and Denzel Washington. These two actors are at the top of their field. They make movies that both make money AND are critically acclaimed. Continue reading 2 Guns